Reframing the Dreaded Losing Streak (Letter 21)

I have been playing American mah jongg for about ten years. I am in such a slump lately and lose game after game. ?? I’m playing defensively enough that I’m not often throwing someone else’s winning tile. What are some suggestions to help improve my play and win some games?

Simply Slumped

Dear Simply Slumped,

Every mah jongg player—no matter how long they’ve been playing—goes through stretches that test their confidence. A slump doesn’t mean you’ve lost your skill; it often means your growth is shifting to a new level.

Playing defensively already shows experience—you’re using awareness and restraint to make thoughtful choices. Still, it’s important to recognize that some factors are simply out of your control, and those can keep you from winning no matter how well you play. When that happens, it helps to reflect on what fuels your frustration. If you catch yourself thinking, “I should be winning more,” that’s your competitive nature speaking. It’s not a flaw—it’s a sign that you care deeply about progress and mastery.

The challenge is learning to play with that drive, not against it. Competitiveness can fuel excellence when it’s rooted in curiosity rather than comparison. Try tracking moments of growth instead of measuring success only by wins:

Are you consistently in a strong position after the Charleston?

When a hand became unwinnable, did you recognize how to pivot?

Were you able to read your opponents’ hands and discard safely?

Did you stay calm and strategic when you chose to fold or block a win?

Each of these moments reflects emotional resilience, situational awareness, and social acuity—the hallmarks of a strong player.

Because so much in mah jongg is beyond our control, no one can expect to win every time. The key is to keep learning, stay present, and find satisfaction in the process—not just the payoff. When you focus on playing well, not merely on winning, your game becomes steadier, your confidence grows, and the wins have a way of returning naturally.”